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my thoughts....
Ah, my dad taught me growing up that expectations only bring heartache and dissapiontment. Just accept the moment, and be joyfull in it. And he was right. All the striving for things that are outside of ourselves just wastes whatever precious moments we have.
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However, Carl and Leslie, I do have one thought for you. I was told for many years by my family, 'the journey is the reward' and I have viewed life as such. Carl, you have had great journeys in your life, searched and discovered your path. What experiences your journey has brought you, and clearly what peace you have encountered as a father and a husband. Leslie, you too have a beautiful family and clearly your place as wife and mother bring you joy and fulfillment. But part of being a good leader is creating good leaders. Your sons are clearly extremely talented young men...very handsome, kind, considerate and intelligent children. But they too have a journey in life. You both had the freedom to experience your journeys, and they deserve that as well.
Carl, your journeys brought you pain, it seems as though your wanderings were a source of consternation to you. But for your sons, that might be different. I know from experience in my family -- my mother loves home with her family around her. While my family was more traditional, she does not enjoy travel, does not care to leave home and prefers a strict regimen. I, on the other hand, am fulfilled by travel...by embracing other cultures, by communicating in other languages by immersing myself in the offerings of the Earth. Neither path is wrong, but my mother and I have had the freedom to discover those paths. Independence is not negative -- for you have had all the independence you crave. You, Carl, are independent, and while you castigate a system of indenpence, you clearly embrace independent beliefs. Allow your children that gift as well.
It is evident that you two love your children, and you have a wonderful family, but don't deny them the very lifestyle you were allowed to have simply because you don't want them to have it. Allow them to determine that for themselves. Allow them their journey as their reward.
Don't we teach our children about our mistakes so they can avoid making the same ones-seems to me that's what Carl is doing...what the hell could be in Thailand that's more interesting then their household?