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Lots of good commentaries you quote up there. Nevertheless, in the end, the commentaries we (including “luminaries”) make, simply reflect what we love, aspire to love, or see glimpses of what we aspire to love. At a deeper level I’d say such commentaries project that which we feel lacking, and thus long for more. Of course there is the flip side, i.e., what we loath, aspire to loath, or see glimpses of aspiring to loath. At a deeper level I’d say such commentaries project that which we feel overflowing, and thus long for less. Words are the symbolic expressions of such feelings. These projections are symptomatic of our inner life; they say much about our fears and needs, and nothing about ‘reality’. In a way this reminds me of Shakespeare’s , "Thou does protest too much!" (or, perhaps the converse of that?)[cite] loom:[/cite]The urging was to go beyond the "form" of the words in the Taoist text and find the essence (or Reality). I will relinquish the platform to those luminaries whose body of work cannot be argued away as mere "words" in the "form" of "human speech." The reader may decide their relevance:
In truth, I see myself just stumbling about feeling my way from moment to moment. The only significant thing that I’ve found so far is [chref=40]Nothing[/chref]. The ‘somethings’ of words just don’t do it justice![cite] as Joe:[/cite]I think that our being "social primates" is a great disclaimer for anything anybody ever says, no matter how "enlightened" it might appear...
Not only seeing the duality, but really coming to grips with it helped me see it for the [chref=65]hoodwink[/chref] that it is. As the good book says, ‘[chref=36]if you would have a thing laid aside, you must first set it up[/chref]’. Personally, I used what I call correlations to grapple with the ultimate nonsense that are words and names.[cite] loom also:[/cite]If we see but duality of the two, how can we know the unity of one, and what of the Tao from which both sprang?
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Very young children are curious and open to the world around them. They experiment with their vocal chords and limbs and gradually learn the two most crucial skills in life: walking and talking. They are not hindered by a fear of making mistakes; they jump right in and tackle the task at hand. As our cognitive ability awakens and we gather in [chref=81]wide learning[/chref], a contrast between this ‘known’ (our learning) and the unknown increases drastically and our insecurity mounts (this is one reason why it helps to [chref=64]desire not to desire, and learn to be without learning[/chref]). To compensate for the insecurity learning causes, we seek protection through perfection. This presents a curious evolutionary problem.
I’ve never found seeking or expecting perfection useful or empowering. Rather, the perfectionist approach misses opportunity’s daily knock on the door. Clinging to perfection is a hurdle to surmount before we can [chref=7]accomplish our private ends[/chref]. We miss out on life when we are seeking, expecting, or hiding behind perfection’s secure walls. Frankly, if we approached life as perfectionists in early childhood we never would have learned to walk or talk.
Note: It is the seeking, clinging and expecting perfection that leads to [chref=71]difficulty[/chref]. Working within perfection, moment to moment, is entirely different. Or as the Bhagavad-Gita puts it, “A harmony in eating and resting, in sleeping and keeping awake: a perfection in whatever one does. This is the Yoga that gives peace from all pain”.
This hints at paying perfect attention to the process of doing whatever you are doing as opposed to thinking of the result, projecting into the future, as you are working. I find that when I'm painting I don't think about how it will look finished, I'm just there with each brush stroke and color. It's only when I'm done that I can decide whether or not I like it or if I am going to run in under the faucet. Well, I must admit, sometimes in the middle it's apparent that it is going down the drain.
Your children are very lucky to have been raised the way you raised them. Also lucky not to have been subjected to big red X's on their school papers. We are conditioned to fear being wrong, of making a mistake. I've found in my old age that, at least in my watercolors, I allow myself to fail. But I'm still too scared and inhibited to try skiing!
1. Being rather new to the site I was very "?" after reading all the stuff about trading spouses. I have a lot of mixed reactions but I must say I am very impressed by the bravery of the Abbott family. Way to go guys! (P.S. I am a 27 year old man who still sleeps on the same bed with my mother and younger sister when we go on vacation. I thought I was weird, but discovered weirder upon learning that Japanese men sleep together in the same room is express deep friendship (i trust you with my life so we sleep in the same room). LOL.
2.Taoism does not say much directly on perfection, but much is revealed indirectly through the Zen aesthetics. Zen aesthetics embraces imperfection and asymmetry, something which really drives Western rationality nuts. The idea here is that nature always produces uneven outcomes, but it is precisely because of diversity that harmony exists.